༺ The Aura of a Skilled Actor ༻
Ooh, you make me live~
You are the reason I live.
Whenever this world is cruel to me~
Whenever this world is cruel to me,
I got you to help me forgive~
Because I have you, I forgive the world.
Ooh, you make me live now, honey~
You are the reason I live, my beloved one.
<You’re My Best Friend by Queen>
A recorded narration played with the background music.
A bright and beautiful melody in C Major. Yet, the narrative recorded over it rustled, unavoidably grim.
If only one person is keeping him alive, then what happens when that person disappears?
Tick—
The actor hunched on the stage raised his head.
He softly began his monologue.
“Day by day, death is approaching. My body is decaying, but my mind is at peace.”
Chills—
Jae Pil’s smile vanished at the first line.
It wasn’t because of the dialogue but because of his voice. The resonance.
The husky voice became an aura, filling the classroom.
The bright, fluorescently lit lecture hall suddenly seemed dark.
The image of a dying man reciting a monologue under a single spotlight in the center of the darkened stage came to mind.
“Jim, who stays by my side, and Mary, who visits me every day, makes me feel less empty than when I was at my peak.”
The performance of someone nearing death.
It would be easier to play the part of someone who is struggling and in pain because they didn’t want to die.
Even portraying a serene satisfaction amidst severe agony is better than most. However…
The calm stoicism born amidst agonizing pain.
The emotion was too dark to express as ‘happiness’, but it wasn’t fearful either as there was a companion who held his hand in the darkness.
To be able to persuade with such a voice the spectacle of a human greeting the end of his life.
La~ Laa~ Laaa~
The BGM gradually increased then abruptly stopped.
Along with it, the actor who had slowly risen filled with vitality in an instant.
Jae Pil let out an ‘ah’ in admiration.
It was Freddie as a child.
— Parok? You’re not British. Did you come from the colony?
— Always have good thoughts, do good deeds, and speak good words according to the teachings of Zoroastrianism.
— Hey, buck teeth. Try closing your mouth. Your teeth are showing.
Narration poured out from the left and right sides of the stage.
With each overlap of words, the boy’s mouth tightened more and more, and his shoulders hunched further. Rather than being crushed by prejudice, it appeared like his self-consciousness had grown stronger.
Thump— thump—
The boy Freddie was tearing through the stage as if unable to control his energy.
When he moved to the left, he bragged, ‘I’m a recognized musician’, and when he moved to the right, he sprawled out drunk at a party.
Seeing him tie together the chaotic scenes of conversing with the non-existent narrations on stage and staggering about on his own so naturally, Jae Pil couldn’t relax his tension.
‘He uses his body very freely. Even if method acting is based on emotions, the acting is bound to be awkward if you can’t use your body properly.’
The lonely and wild momentum exploded from the boy Freddie’s entire body.
Wit and aggression.
Inspiration and inferiority.
When all of those aspects reach their peak, a beast-like momentum dominated the stage.
Mary appeared. It was the beginning of Act 2.
“Hello?”
“He…llo.”
Mary just smiled slightly and walked past.
Everyone couldn’t help but admire her even in that fleeting moment.
She was a refined and pure woman to the point where being called ‘you’re a man’ would’ve felt like an insult. If Jae Pil hadn’t been captivated by Freddie’s acting, he would’ve been greatly impressed.
Freddie’s eyes followed Mary as she disappeared.
She then appeared again. This time, when she passed, she exchanged a glance with him. The wavering gaze deepened a little.
And then for the third time. When their gazes crossed momentarily, it was as if the world had stopped.
*
Dum— Dum—
The cheerful drum sound mixed with the electric guitar. The drum beat throbbed like the feeling of having a first love.
Freddie turned to the left as if rejecting the right side of his body that was involuntarily turning toward Mary, who was growing distant.
But as if magnetized, his body slowly turned to the right again.
1— 2— 3—
In just three seconds, his expression blossomed as if he was reborn.
It was the face of a man falling in love.
However, Jae Pil shuddered for a different reason.
‘What… what was that?!’
The change in expression during those three seconds was not just once.
Five times? No, was it six times?
His expressions were so natural that you wouldn’t know if you didn’t look closely, but his expressions seemed disjointed and abruptly transitioned.
With each expression, Freddie seemed to age one year older, getting a bit more deeply fascinated by her.
And when his body had turned all the way to the right…
He had become a full-fledged young man, seemingly aged about five years more.
‘What should I call this? It’s as if still motions are connected in sequence… but it’s not awkward. Could it be that those intermittent motions are all highly trained movements?’
Jae Pil’s guess was correct.
Yoomyeong, who had practiced to death, had finally internalized each still motion this morning and succeeded in connecting them.
Realizing this, Jae Pil stared at him with his mouth agape.
Though they didn’t understand the meaning, the students couldn’t take their eyes off the captivating performance.
Aside from Ryu Shin, whose face turned pale with shock, there was one more being that was amazed.
‘Did he really pull it off? In that amount of time…?’
The fox spirit clicked its tongue.
Miho thought that Yoomyeong was talented. It also thought that he wasn’t ordinary upon seeing him utilize 200% of the presence given to him.
However, Miho realized it now. The kid was tenacious.
He barely ate or slept, clinging to the advice thrown at him.
‘I didn’t think he could do it, even as I was telling him.’
Training unused muscles in just a few days was nearly impossible. It was like asking a toddler to run.
However, that guy used his body extremely well. Despite being suppressed by others’ presence, he struggled to move his body according to his own will for 15 years. It seemed like he had developed the habit of consciously using every muscle to its utmost.
What was more frightening was that he was doing all of this with a smile.
Even when he woke up from nodding off, he flashed a bright smile, so he got scolded.
— Why are you smiling? You look stupid.
— It’s my first lead role in my life. It’s not an official performance, but it’s still great! Ah, I want to do better!
And he sat down, saying such cheesy words.
Groooo—
Miho observed the aura of the two actors facing each other on the stage. While Ryu Shin’s aura was considerably larger, Yoomyeong’s aura was dynamically blooming, spreading its wings.
This was the aura of a skilled actor.
Even if it was small, it swayed and expanded its presence.
The tender presence, which was too small and faint in its previous life and was crushed no matter how hard it struggled, was now dressed in the strength he had been given and was dominating the stage like David in front of Goliath.
The spectacle was…
‘Hmm. Quite…’
The fox’s nine tails swirled around.
*
Jae Pil was leaning forward as if he would jump out of his desk.
“When I’m with you, I feel the same way as when I’m singing.”
A man full of happiness. He looked confident as if he owned the world.
While admiring the actor who seemed to be possessed by a talented young artist, Jae Pil could not loosen the tension in his skin due to a chilling premonition.
‘…Could it be…again…?’
His successive success, success, and successes.
Every time a man’s voice came from left and right, his face heated up more and more as he struck back like a woman.
His confident gestures slowly instilled anxiety.
Waggle waggle—
The voices of the men overlapped and grew louder.
“I love Mary.”
“She is the love of my life.”
“But…”
Freddie, trying not to hear the growing noise, covered his ears and turned to the right. But the sound, which had grown enough to fill the stage, eventually shattered loudly.
And then.
Finally, as if resigned, Freddie removed his hand from his ear and stood up, turning around.
‘Ah… Again.’
Jae Pil felt a chill down his spine.
The thrill of love turned into an irresistible lust.
An impulse too intense to dismiss as mere agony.
But beneath that impulse was the sadness of a man who had to hurt the love of his soul.
I don’t want to lose you. I really don’t.
Those feelings were divided into cuts and engraved in his eyes.
“I…I think I’m gay.”
“…I knew it. I wanted to pretend that I didn’t know until the very end if I could…”
“I love you.”
“…What do you want me to do?”
“Stay by my side forever.”
“By the side of a man I can’t even hold? Do you know how cruel that is?”
“I know it’s selfish. I know that it’s forced and childish.”
“What am I to you?”
“…You, you’re the love of my life.”
Despite his wholehearted confession, a weary Mary turned her back on him.
He watched her longingly.
He watched as a person precious to him left due to his uncontrollable instincts. With every step she took, he would try to hold her back hundreds of times, dissuade her, plead with her. Not daring to open his mouth, he pleaded with his eyes, hoping she would look back just once.
However, she eventually disappeared off the stage….
A melody began. Then, murmurs flowed from his mouth.
…Love of my life, can’t you see~
Love of my life, don’t you see…
Bring it back, bring it back~
Bring it back, bring it back,
Don’t take it away from me~
Please don’t take it away from me.
Because you don’t know what it means to me ~
You don’t understand what it means to me.
The composition was flawless, and the lyrics were altered to make the dialogue more convincing.
And above all else, the living Freddie on stage.
‘Ah…’
From then on, Jae Pil could no longer ‘evaluate’. He had become an audience member.
*
The performance of Group 1 ended.
The second half, while not excessive, was a performance that contained Freddie’s unique gestures and behaviors and was a sight in itself.
However, it couldn’t compare to the emotional line of Freddie, which relentlessly gripped for 15 minutes without missing a beat.
There wasn’t a female student who didn’t shed tears in the scene where he clung to Mary, and everyone let out a sigh of relief when he finally found his home with Jim.
During the final monologue that harmonized with the beginning, everyone’s eyes turned red.
Clap clap—
After the performance ended, the audience, who couldn’t breathe until the ending BGM completely ceased, only began to clap after a little more time had passed.
Clap clap clap clap—
The applause grew louder and lasted for a long time. Amidst the applause, Yoomyeong trembled.
The applause that was wholly directed at him was the first one that he had received in 15 years.
Though the audience wasn’t large, their sincere applause that lasted until their palms turned red pierced through him with a tingling sensation with each striking sound, enough to make his spine vibrate.
‘This is my acting…’
There was a strange sensation as if someone else had possessed his body and then left.
Despite the emptiness, there was a peculiar catharsis.
‘My hand, my feet, my gaze…’
For a moment, the colors of the world looked different.
In his past life, he did not know that the audience’s gaze imposed further immersion on the already engrossed actor.
Bow—
Yoomyeong awkwardly moved his body as if he had just come to his senses and bowed.
It was his first stage greeting in this life.
*
Jae Pil walked to the front of the class. He wavered slightly when he stood up.
“…Everyone worked hard. Detailed comments will be given after the midterm exam.”
And as he was about to leave the classroom, he couldn’t hold back and turned around.
“I must be fair as a professor, but as an audience, it doesn’t seem polite to keep my mouth shut for a work deserving praise.”
He looked straight at Yoomyeong and spoke.
“At this moment, I want to praise the past me who opened this course for this year. Thank you for letting me see the best method acting of my life.”
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