༺ A Beautiful Night ༻
Eleanor hated herself. She fell short of her mother’s expectations.
Her mother, disappointed with Eleanor as her daughter, never looked at her until the day she eventually passed away.
Why was this memory elusive to Eleanor?
She had been obsessively forcing herself to maintain the appearance of royalty.
Then, one day, she suddenly became unconcerned with everything.
What led her to this indifference?
She asked herself, but the answer was quite obvious. The ever so smart Eleanor already knew it.
It was because it was comfortable.
She no longer wanted to immerse herself in the duties of royalty. Hence, the young Eleanor chose to ignore them.
And only now could she admit that it was a despicable and immature rebellion; the very worst kind.
She had transferred her burden to another version of herself.
Little Eleanor, burdened thus, was standing before her now.
Although she was accompanied by a man she had never seen before, strangely, memories began to calmly surface as she observed Little Eleanor.
The conversation they shared here was being imprinted in her mind like newfound knowledge.
The man was Deus Verdi.
No, he was the real identity behind Deus.
However, that was not important at all. What the current Eleanor needed was solitude; she wanted to disappear.
“Hey.”
Little Eleanor approached her cautiously. However, Eleanor put up her defenses and responded like prickly thorns.
“I told you not to come here! Why did you come? The weak version of me disappeared, hadn’t I? Only the strong you is what remains! You know the duties we should bear!”
“….”
Little Eleanor couldn’t respond.
In the end, they were one and the same. She knew that acting with the conviction and pride of royalty, and taking back control of her body, was the right thing to do.
Logically, it was correct; yet emotionally, it felt wrong.
Little Eleanor wanted to express that she needed her, but it was impossible for her to utter words of weakness due to her nature.
Royalty must never unveil their frailties.
Therefore, it was Deus Verdi who stepped forward to mediate.
He was Kim Shinwoo.
“What do you want me to say to you?”
It was a different tone and voice from the original Deus, yet mirrored his aggressive attitude.
“Do you want me to comfort you? Should I reassure you? Or do you want me to say that we need you?”
As he took a step forward, Eleanor stepped back. Fear showed in her trembling eyes.
“Let me make it clear. You don’t have the qualifications to be a princess, nor do you have the sense of commitment to authority and its duties.”
This was ridiculous.
In fact, all this back-and-forth was unnecessary. The situation itself was too absurd.
Eleanor confessed herself that she couldn’t do it. But wasn’t that obvious?
“Hey! Hey!”
Little Eleanor urgently rushed towards Kim Shinwoo. She grabbed his pant leg, pulled it, and shouted, asking what he was saying.
Kim Shinwoo grabbed Little Eleanor, pulling her forward.
And pointing to Little Eleanor, he declared with a grave expression.
“Look at this little girl. She never shied away from her duties, never rejected them, and faced them head-on. She even nobly sacrificed herself for the kingdom.”
“Huh? Huh?”
Little Eleanor became confused, wondering why he was suddenly praising her.
Eleanor’s expression darkened even more as she tightly sealed her lips.
So, he posed the question.
“Between the two of you, which one is the real Eleanor?”
Both Eleanors responded with a ‘Huh?’ in unison, but neither of them could readily answer.
It seemed like they couldn’t understand what the question was at first.
“Of course…”
“…It’s both of us.”
Their response came hesitantly, but it was the right answer. Kim Shinwoo felt like applauding.
As a professor, he had never properly nurtured a student, but he wondered if it would feel like this when guiding them to find answers on their own.
“Yes, you are not different people. In the end, you are just one personality.”
“Ah.”
Now, the two Eleanors finally understood what he wanted to say. They looked at each other with open mouths.
That was right.
Eleanor, who had a diverse range of emotions, was always cheerful, liked listening to stories of certain characters, and enjoyed chatting in a flower garden.
And the other Eleanor, an ideal ruler with pride, dignity, honor, and convictions required as a royal.
In the end, they were the same person.
“I know it was tough. You endured hardships, and even when it seemed like you would collapse, you persevered diligently. It’s fully understandable.”
Even when she fell and collapsed, her battered body riddled with wounds, she stood up again and again, and eventually came this far.
“Now, look at each other.”
He wanted to tell them they did not need to blame themselves over a lack of a certain ideal, a certain appearance that they so desired.
Because…
“At the end of such hardships, you have already grown splendidly enough to bear the name of royalty.”
Though they might have walked different paths, they had grown up together nonetheless.
Little Eleanor slowly reached out her hand. She smiled as she extended that hand as if suggesting they put an end to the long wandering.
They cautiously touched each other’s hands.
No dazzling display of light was necessary. It was even a luxury if this action caused enormous mana fluctuations.
They were just a little girl.
Only when she properly faced herself did she finally realize her identity.
Eleanor was just one person.
Ironically, it was only her own self she longed for.
“Indeed, we have acted like fools.”
Eleanor, who had called herself pathetic, displayed relief in her expression.
She felt lighter.
The girl’s eyes now held deep convictions, as well as trust and reliance in herself.
Rumble!
Suddenly, the entire building began to shake. There was no time for the startled duo to unburden their emotions.
The world within the dream was collapsing.
“This is crazy.”
“M-mother?”
Both shouted simultaneously, looking down from the railing.
Hylan, who was blown away earlier, turned bigger and was now devouring the building as she approached this direction.
She had become extremely similar to the giants depicted in comic books.
“Excuse me for a moment.”
Kim Shinwoo placed his hand on Eleanor’s waist, poured out mana once again, and they soared into the sky together.
Since mental strength was the basis of mana here, his reserves were nearly boundless, akin to having infinite mana.
“I-it’s too rough!”
However, because he couldn’t handle it properly, they could only shake as if their bodies were being tossed in a storm.
***
He didn’t know how long they had been flying.
They continued flying endlessly, and now, the ground had become so faint that it couldn’t be seen.
There was no destination.
Eleanor, nestled in his arms, recalled the most impressive story he had told her before.
It was the story of magical girls, where ordinary academy students would chance on an animal with strange powers, granting them unique mana to fight for justice.
Eleanor found that story truly interesting.
It was quite surprising how vividly he could imagine such a lively story.
Among what he had told her, this was part of the story she liked the most:
The girls fought to protect the world, yet they still managed to live ordinary lives—laughing, chatting, and loving someone, just like ordinary people.
This consoled her.
Even little girls with grand purposes of saving the world weren’t in their transformed states forever.
‘I am, too…‘
A royal. A princess.
She was someone who always had to be a special existence.
But there was no need to be special forever.
If she showed the appearance of a princess only when necessary, she would embody true wisdom.
Feeling grateful that she managed to realize this even if it was late, Eleanor looked at Kim Shinwoo.
If she pondered further on magical girls’ tale a bit more…
They too experienced love, but the story didn’t emphasize much on their romantic involvement.
Most of them already harbored affections from the beginning of the story.
Eleanor used to think that part of the story wasn’t all that appealing. A sudden first love completely out of the blue? A romance where one fell in love at first sight?
She thought it was quite artificial, a convenient plot device.
Now, Eleanor couldn’t help but admit.
‘Indeed, it’s a realistic story.’
Taking advantage of the excuse that she might fall off, she hugged his waist even more tightly.
Although the situation they were in was so intense that she should have felt dizzy and nauseous, she felt no sense of motion sickness at all.
Because it was just a dream.
That was the final distinction from reality that prevented her from getting caught by her other self.
The fact that she couldn’t feel dizzy.
But Eleanor somehow disliked that now.
‘Why now?’
Even in this situation where her body was shaking violently, there was no vertigo or motion sickness. Nothing to hinder her mind, her memory.
Thus, the man’s face was all the more vividly imprinted in her mind.
“It would have been better if I was so dizzy that I couldn’t even regain my senses.”
If that were the case, she could have simply dismissed the overwhelming and haphazardly resonating emotions as mere dizziness.
It was such a shame, but…
She wished this dream would last a bit longer.
Such was Eleanor’s hope.
* * *
“Keuhm.”
As I cautiously opened my eyes, a wave of lightheadedness surged up. The feeling I hadn’t experienced in the dream world had now caught up with me.
It felt like the sensation of anesthesia wore off, so I took a deep breath while adjusting my posture.
“Ugh!”
However, if anyone was experiencing something worse than me, that person was Eleanor.
She couldn’t keep her body steady and almost fell over the balcony railing, but I pulled her back forcefully, saving her with much difficulty.
Thud!
However, the problem was that, due to that, her body slammed toward my side and we collided.
Anyway, Eleanor held onto her throbbing head while falling on top of me.
I thought we had spent quite a long time inside, but the party happening below the balcony was still in full swing.
When I glanced at the Dark Spiritualist who was next to me, she explained with a subtle expression.
[Only around 10 minutes passed. I wondered what the two of you were doing just standing still.]
‘10 minutes.’
I could say that my soul was swept away by the violent force of Lemegeton and was mixed into the dream. However…
‘Doing it again would be too much.‘
I had to admit it was a dangerous method. Lemegeton’s power was stronger than I imagined, it tore through the boundaries between dreams and the soul.
Well, in the end, this might not have been the wrong course of action to take.
As I discreetly lowered my gaze, Eleanor, now seemingly recovered, looked up at me while in my arms.
Seeing her flushed face, I was about to tell her to get down.
After a moment of hesitation, I looked past her and opened my mouth.
“There was a novelist named Natsume Soseki. He became famous for expressing a confession of love as ‘The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?’1月が綺麗ですね | tsuki ga kirei desu ne translates to “The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?” This phrase is a more poetic way of saying I love you. During Japanese writer Natsume Sōseki’s (1867-1916) teaching years, he supposedly overheard a student translating “I love you” rather awkwardly into its literal and direct translation: “Ware Kimi wo Aisu.” Soseki believed—as a product of his time and culture in the Meiji period—that this direct translation rejected Japanese sensibility. Thus, this more subtle, nuanced translation of “the moon is beautiful…” was born..”
At my words, Eleanor blinked her big eyes and then burst out in laughter,
“What are you talking about?”
It was a refreshing tone, devoid of regrets or lingering feelings.
“Indeed, this is reality!”
In response to that answer, I found myself smiling like a crescent moon.
Truly, it was a night graced with a beautiful moon.
