༺ Fourth Chapter – Anhui (6) ༻
“Don’t play tricks. If you don’t have it, then where the hell has the seal disappeared to?!”
“I truly do not know. The Family Head left me no such thing…”
“Bullshit!”
The elder’s loud shout echoed across the room.
The frail lady stood tall, facing his wrath with resolve.
“Why would I have any reason to lie?”
“Plenty! You, a low-born, have caught the Family Head’s eye and taken his place. Now that he’s gone, you think you have the Zhang House in your grasp! You must think without that seal, everything will be yours!”
The woman’s shoulders trembled and her fists clenched tightly, showing how deeply his accusations had affected her.
But she did not back down.
As if she had no other choice, she merely stared at the old man and replied.
“…I do not know.”
“You fucking bitch…!”
The elder ground his teeth, trying to suppress his anger before finally breaking into a sneer.
“…Sure, let’s see how long you can keep this up.”
He stood up, his eyes filled with contempt and hatred for her, before clicking his tongue and leaving the room.
Slam–
As the door slammed shut, the woman finally relaxed and let out a deep breath. Each word had pierced her heart like a knife, and though she was overwhelmed with no one to lean on, she did not break down.
‘It’s fine. I’m used to it.’
She was used to this treatment; she had been prepared for these moments from the day she entered the Zhang Family Compound as a lowly commoner.
The woman held back the tears threatening to leak out and lifted her head.
At that moment.
“Ahhh… It’d be troubling for me if you cried like that. I can’t just overlook the tears of a lady, you know.”
An unfamiliar voice echoed in the room.
She quickly looked up to see a young man with a mischievous smile standing before her, causing her to look confused.
“W-Who are… Hey…!””
“Shh–”
The man, Zhuge San, placed a finger against his lips.
He then took out a worn letter from his robe.
“I’ve come to deliver a letter. It’s from your younger brother.”
The lady froze, her eyes widening at his words.
“Your brother is illiterate. I wrote down the words for him, so please disregard the handwriting and read it.”
He was a suspicious man.
The woman thought it was highly likely that he was lying. Yet she accepted the letter handed to her as if clinging to some shitty lifeline.
“I was asked to check if his Esteemed Sister was living well, but…”
As Zhuge San unfolded the letter, she held her breath, and he could see the sorrow welling up in her dead eyes.
“…It seems you’re not doing too well.”
“…”
The woman bit her lips as she read through the letter.
‘I’m fine, so don’t worry too much.’
‘I know you’re very sad to lose your husband, but I believe you’ll get through this.’
‘Sorry for being unable to visit.’
Even though it was written by another person, the heartfelt concern of her only blood had made its way into her heart.
“…That’s my younger brother alright. Telling lies that don’t hold up.”
“Hm?”
“He must not be doing too well. After all, the letters I used to send every month have stopped.”
Her self-mocking tone made Zhuge San fall silent. The man he had met was indeed in a pitiful state.
The silence seemed to mean she accepted it.
The woman’s grip on the letter tightened, crumpling it as she looked up.
“Thank you for bringing news of my brother. If it’s not too much trouble, may I ask another favor?”
“…What is it?”
The woman opened a wardrobe to reveal a matching pair of jade rings and several gold accessories, holding them out.
“…Could you deliver these to him? I beg of you.”
“Hm… Why not go to him yourself?”
“You must have heard the elder’s words. And you must have seen on your way here. I am trapped in this place.”
Zhuge San nodded.
‘A common tale, isn’t it?’
Women of low birth pressured by their families after becoming legitimate wives, widows threatened for their position, living lives akin to imprisonment – it happened everywhere.
Zhuge San’s gaze fell on her stomach.
It was barely noticeable but slightly bulging.
‘She’s not alone then.’
Clearly, she had something precious to protect.
“From how you snuck in here without making a sound, you must be a martial artist of considerable skill, correct?”
“Well, let’s say that’s the case. But why trust me with this? What if I run off with it?”
“Why would someone dressed in such an expensive outfit commit such an act, what could possibly be lacking for you to do that?”
Her eyes lingered on his clothes.
Zhuge San smacked his lips and scratched the back of his head.
“Huh, should have changed clothes before coming.”
“I’m aware it’s an unreasonable request, but…”
“It’s fine.”
Zhuge San smirked slightly.
“In the first place, I came here because I felt uncomfortable leaving things be, so I’ll gladly help.”
“Ah, thank you…!”
“But.”
Zhuge San leaned in, meeting her eyes, then said.
“Consider this by evening. Think about whether enduring here is truly the best for your child.”
The woman’s eyes tinged with doubt.
Zhuge San gave an awkward smile.
‘Hah, I shouldn’t be sticking my nose in.’
It was none of his business, but he couldn’t help it.
There was someone he was reminded of when he saw women like her.
“If I were your child, I wouldn’t want to see my mother suffering for my sake.”
“What do you mean by that…?”
“Give it some thought. I’ll give you about two hours. I’ll be back when the sun goes down.”
With those words, Zhuge San disappeared as abruptly as he had arrived.
The woman, left alone in the room, pondered his words deeply.
“San.”
Amidst a daze, Zhuge San heard a voice and raised his head.
The scene before him was the family’s inner quarters where he had spent his childhood, with well-tended trees, a pond, and a woman he had longed for all his life.
“San!”
“Mother…”
This was his mother, whom he could no longer meet.
She had narrowly- opened eyes and a fox-like face, but contrary to her appearance, she was a kind-hearted woman who was honest to a fault.
She stomped her feet angrily towards him and then yanked his ear. As his ear was being pulled, Zhuge San realized he was in his childhood body from the height difference between them.
“Oh, it’s just a dream.’
His mother in the dream shouted at the top of her lungs.
“How many times does your mom have to tell you to stay away from the outhouses!”
Her forehead was bulging with veins, showing that she was more than just a little upset. But despite her anger, Zhuge San burst out into laughter the moment he saw her.
“You’re laughing?! LAUGHING?!”
“Ugh! M-Motherrrrrrrr!!!”
It was an incredibly vivid dream.
Although he felt no pain, his mouth involuntarily cried out as if matching the feeling.
“Why are you always rummaging through those outhouses?!?!”
Zhuge San recalled this was a memory from when he was six, obsessed with Tales of the Martial Heroes.
He had read when the protagonist of the fourth chapter, the Benevolent Hero, hid in an outhouse to evade assassins from the Unorthodox Sects.
It had left a deep impression on him, much to his mother’s dismay.
“I-I was wrong…”
“You should know better! No, you should have never done that in the first place!”
Zhuge San repeatedly apologized, all the while he laughed.
‘Ah.’
It was a return the moment when he was truly happy. Even though this was a dream, he didn’t want to wake up. This return was too sweet.
As tears welled up in his eyes, he smiled while looking at his mother.
A woman of humble birth who became the lady of the Zhuge Clan.
Always dignified despite her origins…
…and warm-hearted until the day she lost her life to poison.
“I can’t live because of you! Do you know what the elders say when they see you? They call you the Toilet Young Master! Toilet Young Master!”
His beloved mother’s voice pierced his ears. She let go and placed a hand on her forehead, sighing deeply before bending down.
“Hey, little San. Are you listening? Should I just burn that Tales of the Martial Heroes book to get your head straight?”
“I apol…”
“Heroes are good. Good, but why are you so fixated on the outhouses after all the other cooler scenes? Why not admire the Sword Hero or something?
“The Sword Hero isn’t cool…”
“You brat, I ought to wash your mouth out!”
Zhuge San’s mother pinched his lips as if they were a duck’s bill, and she chuckled bitterly, shaking her head in disbelief.
“Ah, forget it. What’s the use of telling you.”
It was always like this.
She’d start off incredibly angry, but after a few exchanges, she’d let go of her anger and end up laughing.
Zhuge San loved that about her, so he joined in with a smile.
“Mother.”
“What now!”
“Thank you.”
His mother furrowed her eyebrows, uneasy about what the heck he might spout next.
Zhuge San chuckled, remembering how much of a troublemaker he was in his younger days, and added.
“Please visit often.”
It was such a pleasant dream.
However, because of that, he knew he shouldn’t stay too long.
She belonged to the past, and what she truly wanted was for him to move forward.
–Be someone you can be proud of.
She was the sort of person who would make that kind of request, even in her last moments.
“I really…”
Zhuge San held back his words, carefully thinking about the emotions he kept deep within, and then, the words he had always wanted to tell her came out clearly.
“…really love you.”
The scene faded away.
Zhuge San opened his eyes on the roof of the inner quarters.
Blinking, he let out a bitter smile and began to collect the jade stones that were scattered around.
For a moment, everything felt hazy before he snapped back into focus.
‘Hm…’
A contented smile appeared on his lips, savoring the lingering feelings of the encounter with the face he had missed in his dream.
The sky turned a crimson hue.
Upon seeing that the two hours were almost up, Zhuge San got to his feet.
‘Let’s go see.’
It was time to hear her decision.
“Have you made up your mind?”
The woman looked at the man before her.
He was smiling, waiting for her answer with a cheerful expression.
Although she was still suspicious, the woman could not hide the hope she had placed in him.
“…May I ask you one thing?”
“Please.”
“Why are you going to such lengths to help me?”
Her expression hardened as she met Zhuge San’s eyes.
As fragile as she may have appeared, the look in her eyes burned with determination.
“Do you need a reason?”
“I do.”
The woman clenched her hands that were resting on her knees.
“I do not have much to offer in return. Though I may sit in the position of the lady of the Zhang House, what I truly possess is meager. Whether I stay here alone or flee as the Great Master suggested, there is nothing of value for you to gain.”
“I’m aware.”
“Then please tell me. Knowing that, why do you still wish to help?”
That question was the last bastion of her rationality, the last line of defense she could use to protect the child within her.
To follow him without knowing his intentions would put her unborn child’s safety at risk simply because she wanted someone to place her hopes in.
Zhuge San looked back at her silently.
He examined her tense face for a long while before finally flashing a grin and answering.
“I just want to.”
“…What?”
“I’m just doing it because I feel like it.”
The woman looked stunned.
Zhuge San found her reaction rather amusing and continued.
“I’m a man who can’t stand seeing a woman cry.”
Especially a woman who was about to become a mother.
He wouldn’t be able to look at himself proud in the face if he ignored a grieving woman.
That was the reason his chivalry existed. To wipe away their tears.
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